Finished what I think (and hope) will be the final scene for Fighting Spiders yesterday.
While I’m grateful for the recurring scenes, its really not a good role. Heck it’s actually a painful one where I either get roughen or beaten up every time I appear on screen. This is the price I pay, I guess, in my ever on-going quest to break my typecasting.
Had a good talk with Nemy (Short for nemesis :P) while we waited for our scenes. I think we’ve been “rivals” so long we are actually beginning to feel more friendly towards each other. It is somewhat comforting to know he is now feeling what I was feeling two years back about the industry, and it made me wonder do all actors go through this phase right about this stage in their career?
This phase is of course the dreaded J word – jadedness. If you compare the enthusiasm we had when we first started out and the fire we have now, there is, undoubtedly, a huge difference. But this is usually role-related.
When we first start out, every minor role feels like a major one because there are so many challenges presented to us. But once we conquer these molehills we often look forward to scale the next peak. Only to find more and more molehills. And we all know how lame it is to make mountains out of molehills.
I have no doubt our enthusiasm and fire will be back when we get a good role. But in the meantime, we do all we can to stop this jadedness from growing and dousing our internal embers.
And then we wonder, how long more can I keep this up?
