My Reelity

Is this the reel life or is this just fantasy?


Posted by Ruok On June - 30 - 2007

And a whole bunch of other updates as well. Grab a drink, this is a long one.


Perhaps they’ve finally reconsidered my answers to the Q&A after all. Either that or I really wasn’t good enough. But regardless of what the reason may be, a huge part of me is glad that it is finally over. Preparation for this have stressed me more than anything, which shouldn’t be the case if its supposedly something you are passionately about. That’s what I think anyway.

A special thanks to Jer for encouraging me and bearing with me. I owe ya babe, and let me buy you a drink next time we meet.

Of course, I’ll to admit, a part of me is disappointed as well. I set high standards for whatever I do, and I always aim high. And when I fall short of those standards I always feel disappointed with myself. I realise this applies pretty much to almost all aspects of my life. But while I have always pick myself up and strive to do better the next time round, something tells this would be an exception; as I don’t think I will be doing anything like this in the future.

Perhaps, I’m also disappointed in Him. I mean I might be wrong and this really isn’t what He willed for after all, but if it is, then I cannot really fathom why this short journey was necessary. Of course, His ways are above our ways etc etc, but still, this really feels more like a cruel practical joke. Ok, better stop now before I get hit by a thunderbolt. 😛

In fact, this whole month seems to be like a cruel practical joke. Losing things, losing my beloved ipod, losing a few clients, losing that part time teaching position I was gunning for, losing out on auditions (which is quite common actually so really shouldn’t be part of this list) and losing chances with girls (which is also quite common actually and shouldn’t be part of this list). It’s been one hell of a month. Literally.

Beck – Loser

Heck, the whole first half of the year ain’t that sweet as well. Sure, I’ve gotten myself back to the stage (in more ways than one) but other than that, hardly anything noteworthy had cropped out. True, I’ve been up to my neck in other work as well, but it would have been nice for something cool to prop up every now and then to at least break the tedium of things.

For the next six months, I can’t really say I can see the light at the end of the tunnel yet. I’ve still got a few options to explore, but they are not really that great options. But I’ve got one more busy month to go, before I go and protect this country for the good of foreigners. Hopefully the irony in the jungle air will help shed some light.

But for now, I just glad June is ended.

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